Marriage Counseling - Deluded in relationship

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People can be deluded in a relationship not because they are being ignorant but because they are trying to protect themselves from inconvenient truth. But this self-deception can prove highly frustrating for a partner. People who are deluded often find it hard to face the truth, especially when this has a direct bearing on their emotional well being, as in the cases when a deluded person is in a relationship. Despite the attempts of a partner, a deluded person often refuses to listen to the truth put to them, and in doing so will often find excuses to convince themselves of their perceived reality. Even an experienced marriage counsellor may find it hard to convince a delusional person of the reality, however this does not mean to imply marriage counseling sessions are not effective in addressing these kind of behaviour, just that the success of the marriage counseling very much depends on the extent to which a partner is delusional.

Signs associated with a deluded behaviour

The people who are deluded also exhibit the following behavioural characteristics:

  • A person refuses to listen to advice from those closest to them. Please see marriage counseling and listening to help a partner with the listening skills.
  • A person finds themselves practicing stories or excuses in advance of a conversation.
  • Exaggerating stories each time the same story is told.
  • Constantly using euphemisms to describe one's own short falls.
  • People who delude themselves almost always remember the positive comments and ignore the negative ones.

Research has shown that the level of self-deception comes down to how concerned a person is about how others see them. Delusional people tend to be more concerned about portraying themselves to others in a positive light.

Unfortunately, self-deception to an extreme can only be helped with expert help of a trained counselor or psychologist.


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