Marriage counseling can help Domineering people to understand why they feel a need to dominate their partner in the relationship. Domineering people can be very difficult to live with as they tend to be paranoid and single minded in achieving what they want. Marriage counseling can help a Domineering person to understand the root cause of their behavior. Domineering people can also be control freaks.
What makes a person become Domineering
People who are domineering are often driven to achieve result to the extent that they
are sometimes seen as control freaks. This is often because they
have a hard time with delegation. However, this
will inevitably make a domineering person feel tired and over worked, and its
not surprising either as they spend a lot of time
trying to control their "environment". In marriage counseling,
the biggest problem a marriage counselor is faced with is to get
the couples to recognise their flaws. In cases where one partner
posses a Domineering personality, the marriage counselor is faced with a difficult
task as this behavioral attribute can become physically addictive. The person
who posses a Domineering personality will inevitably also become addicted to the chemicals that
the body produce to help us deal with a crisis, and because of this physical addiction,
a Domineering partner may refuse to change, or find it hard even if they choose to do so. It is always easier for them to recognise the controlling
behavior in others than themselves.
Typical attributes associated with a Domineering personality
The typical attributes associated with a Domineering personality include:
- Stress
- Impatience
- Paranoia
- Aggression
Unfortunately the only time a controlling person feels a sense
of relief, calm and security is when they behave according to
their righteous inner laws. A desire to control one's environment
isn't in itself a bad thing as, if kept in check,
then the results would mean self motivation, dedication and assertiveness.
But, this behavior becomes a problem when one partner in a relationship
tries to control another in order to achieve result. That's when relationship conflicts can,
and very often do, ensue.
Why do people become Domineering
People are often trying to control and dominate their environment because they are afraid
of their own internal chaos. This causes anxiety as
their aim is to protect themselves against their inner fears and nightmares,
often stem from a previously traumatic experience.
Many controlling people can probably pinpoint a time in
their lives when they felt that control of their lives was taken
away from them, which then serves in driving them to prevent a similar experience from happening again.
How to a help a Domineering person
To stop the need to control one's environment is to consciously force oneself not to be on top of everything. It is important to recognise that we cannot stop the occasional misfortune from occurring. For example, to break free from a desire to control a partner is to have faith and trust in that the partner will do the right thing. A Domineering person needs to understand that trying to dominate a partner can be stiffening and inevitably have the opposite effect. A partner that is being "controlled" does often find ways to bring some control back by, consciously or sub-consciously, rebelling and finding ways to redress the balance. But its important to realise that eventually this desire to control other people will drive a partner away.
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