Marriage Counseling can help parents resolve the Power Struggles brought about as the result of differences in parenting techniques. There are a number of ways to avoid parenting power struggles, which include:
- Avoid getting into arguments about discipline, diet or schools. Instead, try holding debate style discussions.
- Never argue about the child in front of the child as this results in each couple trying to save face, rather than what's actually in the best interest of the child. Also, it is very upsetting, confusing and guilt inducing for the child. Alternatively, a child could try to take advantage of this division to recruit an ally to play one parent off against the other in order to avoid being disciplined.
- Try avoiding inconsistencies that encourages a child to play off one parent against the other. If a child asks permission for something that the other parent may object to, refuse to give an answer until the other partner is also consulted. If the child insists on an immediate response, enquire as to whether the other parent has also been consulted (its important to remind children that as a rule they must not ask for something of you if the other parent has already given an answer). In doing so, it is also important to remind the child of the consequences of lying and a break down in trust.
- Rules must be discussed and agreed upon prior to presenting them to the child child.
- In situations where a decision affecting the children is necessary, the basis for the decision has to be explained to the children and the other parent. Under no circumstance should one parent side with a child behind the other parent's back. This puts pressure on the child, even if the child gets what they want, dividing their loyalties.
- If the child complains about a perceived unfair treatment by the other parent, it is important to acknowledge the complaint by reassuring the child that the complaint is understood and will be dealt with appropriately. Then, this can be discussed with the other parent at the earliest opportunity, without the child being privy to the conversation. If the other parent's agrees that the treatment has been rather unfair, then it is important for that parent to have the discussion with the child, explaining the reason for the change in mind. In doing so, the child not only feel that the parents are fair, but also that they are united and "in love".
- If an argument between the parents is unavoidable in the presence of the child, then it is important that the child is also present when the parents work out their differences.
- Don't forget that any major power struggle between the parents may very well require the help of a qualified marriage counselor in order to achieve resolution.
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Marriage counseling information designed to help guide couples in choosing a suitable therapist. There are currently a number of different approaches to therapy and as such it is important for a couple to choose the approach that they feel is the suitable.
This Divorce Checklist will provide couples with a list of the more important things to consider. However, it is important to point out that divorce should only be considered as a last resort, and only when all other avenues of reconciliation have been explored and been unable to help.
Understand the effects of divorce on children and what they may be feeling. Also, what the parents should be doing to help the children cope with the divorce.
PEYMA's Relationship Questionnaire is desinged to provide Relationship Counseling without a need to attend any counseling sessions. This approach is able to provide an insight into the root cause of a behavioural conflict, as well as, how to behave in order to be more compatible.
Signs of Infidelity can help expose a relationship betrayal before it gets too involved, therefore improving the chances of recovery. Identifying these signs correctly is vital as any misjudgement can in itself lead to marital disputes and feelings of mistrust.
Recovering from infidelity is not going to be easy, but an experienced therapist can help with overcoming this affliction. It is important to recognise that a person will never forget what has taken place, but it is possible to rebuild the trust and move on.
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